Ego and fear

Hello Blogosphere Folks,

I have missed you! I just submitted an article for peer review and my mind is still in writing mode so I thought I would hop back into the blogosphere.

I was working on this paper for two months. It was challenging to settle in after work and write when I felt like there were so many other things I needed to be doing. I would write a little and then do dishes or go food shopping (I know, so very exciting). By last weekend I had the paper done for the most part but I was on the fence about actually submitting it. My mind was torn between wanting to create something really great and not wanting to admit that rejection could be on the other side of submitting the paper. This internal battle has been one I have faced many times before when writing. I never feel like I’ve made the “right” conclusion or I feel like it’s not good but good enough so I don’t review it and just submit. It’s a problem, one I contributed it to my poor writing skills and my insecurities.

With my wavering motivation to get this paper done, I decided to hide in yoga class on Saturday morning. It was the greatest choice I could have made that Saturday! It wasn’t that the yoga was different than usual but the instructor Jessica does themes for every class. This Saturday’s theme was “Ego & Fear”. The idea was that when fear starts to hinder us from moving forward our Ego will step in and make up excuses so that we don’t need to admit to the fear or face it. Jessica used this in relation to trying out yoga poses and going deeper into poses than we normally would. At the end of class she invited everyone to think about this theme in our lives and to work on breaking past the excuses our ego has made for us. All I could think about was this paper that I didn’t know if I wanted to submit because I didn’t want to be embarrassed by being rejected. So I sent in my submission and I do not know if it will be accepted but I put forth my best editing efforts this past week and that’s all that is within my power.

Thanks for reading! Sorry for the major gap in posts, my new goal is to write a new post every week! Stay tuned!



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